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If someone stole and trashed one of your vintage collectables, what would you have them buy you in consollation?
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bnybny
4 Posts
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1
12 November 2013 - 6.25pm

Hello kind souls : )

I just found out that a very cherished Beatle relic of mine from childhood was thrown out by my father during a period when he was ticked off at me.  I'd had it nearly 35 years and it'd been in the family safety deposit box at the bank.  I had no access to it, but he did and now he says he took it out and has no idea what happened to it.  But he did tell me he took it out and "lost" it during a period when he was mad at me.  He didn't tell me at the time when he took it out.  He just told me today, when I naively asked him to check on it when he went to the bank today.

I found the Beatles shortly after I regained my hearing as a small child, 5 years old.  The first album I listened to was Sgt. Pepper.  Since then they've been a daily, intimate part of my life.  One of the most important parts of my life.  Their music carried me through things I shouldn't have been able to have survived, many times.  He's always known how much they've meant to me, so I can only guess that he meant to hurt me in one of the very most painful ways possible.  He's trying to deflect the blame to me, because I upset him.  I've never taken or damaged any of his things.  In fact, knowing he's a music lover, I took him to look at I Pods yesterday.

I've decided to handle this situation as best I can.  I'll find the same vintage mirror that he "lost" online and re-buy it, but, I've also decided that he'll buy me something for my troubles that he initiated.  That's why I'm here.  Within reason, what would you have them buy you as consolation?  Collectable-wise?

I do believe in peace and love and understanding, that's how I live my life.  This situation just cuts me to the bone.  I have so little and for someone I love to take something so precious and meaningful.  It destroys my trust of someone I love almost completely.  It just calls for a kindness to be repaid (I guess, "The best things in life are free/but you can keep 'em for the birds and bees" in this case.)

((Thank you Beatles people))

 

 

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trcanberra
Oz
5857 Posts
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2
12 November 2013 - 8.11pm

Hey - welcome aboard.

It's not a Beatles thing but we had a burglary a few years back and I had an ancient pocket watch stolen that was handed down to me by my great-grandfather.  Can't be replaced.  I have decided that a healthy happy family is more important than 'thingies'.

==> trcanberra and hongkonglady - Together even when not (engaged for those not in the know!) <==

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meanmistermustard

19113 Posts
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12 November 2013 - 8.25pm

I would mention that you are going to get a replacement and kindly suggest if he was able to contribute to the cost then that would be great but it's not something to force. As trcanberra says it's not worth falling out over. I know families who have fallen out over material possessions and it's horrible seeing it happen over what ultimately is not as valuable.

"I told you everything I could about me, Told you everything I could" ('Before Believing' - Emmylou Harris) 

"Don't make your love suffer insecurities; Trade the baggage of "self" to set another one free" ('Paper Skin' - Kendall Payne)

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Zig
The Toppermost of the Poppermost

8734 Posts
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12 November 2013 - 8.46pm

meanmistermustard said
I would mention that you are going to get a replacement and kindly suggest if he was able to contribute to the cost then that would be great but it's not something to force.

I echo that advice. Pity it had to happen in the first place.

To the fountain of perpetual mirth, Let it roll for all its worth.

Every Little Thing you buy from Amazon or iTunes will help the Beatles Bible if you use these links: Amazon | iTunes

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Ahhh Girl
sailing on a winedark open sea

12438 Posts
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12 November 2013 - 8.57pm

Has your dad already agreed to get you something for your troubles? If so, then we can go from there. If not, take the wise advice of the 3 posters before me.

bnybny
4 Posts
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6
12 November 2013 - 9.00pm

He already knows he's buying me back the mirror he trashed and something as consolation, I told him.  I've spent my life letting all the little things slide and more.  "Not A Second Time" is kind of the message I care to send.  It's hard to believe you can love someone but not trust them, but that's it.  I'm the one who gave him the asprin when he was having a heart attack 2 months ago, now he's attacked my heart, and not randomly either.

His own mother threw away numerous precious childhood possessions he had and I've been hearing about that for 40 years.  Comforting him over it for ages.  For him to turn around and do the same thing is inexcusable. 

The family won't fall apart because of this only b/c I won't let it happen (my mom's equally ticked that he did this, and she's part of the social glue of the family, too.) He's not getting a free pass on this, it meant too much and he should've known better.  Like I told him, the only worse things he could have done would've been to deprive me of my family or kill my dog.  I know it's a lot more Hammurabi than the Vedas, I'll do the spiritual atonement, it's up to him to do the material atonement.

So the family will be fine, what I'm asking is ideas for great collectables to buy. 

Any suggestions?

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meanmistermustard

19113 Posts
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7
12 November 2013 - 9.31pm

Ah. Right, gotcha.  Good to hear the family base is secure but i would suggest finding a way to get past this despite what has been done. But that's not what you came here for so i will shut up.

It comes down to the price range and the kind of area of collectable you are interested in. You could go from an original Butcher sleeve to authentic autographs to picture discs to limited edition pencil cases. I'm not looking to be unhelpful just that there is tons of stuff out there. 

Something related to Pepper since that was the first LP you heard?

"I told you everything I could about me, Told you everything I could" ('Before Believing' - Emmylou Harris) 

"Don't make your love suffer insecurities; Trade the baggage of "self" to set another one free" ('Paper Skin' - Kendall Payne)

bnybny
4 Posts
(Offline)
8
12 November 2013 - 9.38pm

You're right about getting past it, meanmistermustard : )  That's honestly the best and most relieving part of situations like these.  And we will.  To snag a line from George, "It's gonna take time/a whole lot of precious time."  Hopefully less time than more.

When it comes to collectables, I'm thinking the $40-50 range might be poignant enough, but still not take advantage of the situation.

(btw--I love your name : )  Whenever I need a pick me up I like listening to the triology of Mean Mr. Mustard/Polythene Pam/She Came In Through The Bathroom Window.)

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meanmistermustard

19113 Posts
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9
12 November 2013 - 10.44pm

Yeah it will take time but hopefully the wounds will heal. One of my favourite singers, Kendall Payne, wrote that "We cannot time our wounds to heal on human clocks", very true.

Ok, next question to bring down the range further are you looking for something with a bit of history already or something new that will become a collectible?

"I told you everything I could about me, Told you everything I could" ('Before Believing' - Emmylou Harris) 

"Don't make your love suffer insecurities; Trade the baggage of "self" to set another one free" ('Paper Skin' - Kendall Payne)

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SatanHimself
Hades-on-Leith
666 Posts
(Offline)
10
12 November 2013 - 10.48pm

It sounds like replacing a Beatles collectible might be the lesser problem in this relationship.

E is for 'Ergent'.

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trcanberra
Oz
5857 Posts
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11
12 November 2013 - 10.52pm

My grandmother threw out a complete Punch and Judy set; tent, puppets and all - 19th century kit - that my grandfather had trained me on and left to me in his will.  She had a clearing out when he died.  What can you do?  I had already lost one grandparent, I didn't want to have the remaining one on the outer.

==> trcanberra and hongkonglady - Together even when not (engaged for those not in the know!) <==

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parlance
Slaggers
7065 Posts
(Offline)
12
12 November 2013 - 11.02pm

Just want to say welcome and I sympathize. In a moment of anger when I was a teen, my father threw out a ton of my childhood mementos (I have almost no photos of myself as a child, for instance) as well as some Duran Duran memorabilia (some of it signed). Similar to what you said, it's not the thing itself that counts but the spiteful intent of someone you should be able to trust that cuts through you.

I hope once he makes material amends you two can heal the relationship.

parlance

Beware of sadness. It can hit you. It can hurt you. Make you sore and what is more, that is not what you are here for. - George

Check out my fan video for Paul's song "Appreciate" at Vimeo or YouTube.

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Funny Paper
America
2080 Posts
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13
13 November 2013 - 12.04am

buybuy -- It's only a conjecture, but it may be that your father did not merely "lose" that item -- he may have sold it for money.

Faded flowers, wait in a jar, till the evening is complete... complete... complete... complete...

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Ahhh Girl
sailing on a winedark open sea

12438 Posts
(Offline)
14
13 November 2013 - 12.23am

Official Beatles postage stamps
Beatles trading cards
Hallmark Christmas ornaments
vintage LP
Sgt. Peppers salt and pepper shakers
Sgt. Peppers jigsaw puzzle
commemorative plate

Do any of these go in the right direction?

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vonbontee
Inside an Apple Orchard in a Letterbox
2815 Posts
(Offline)
15
13 November 2013 - 2.40pm

Damn, this is a depressing thread. :(

I remember George saying 'Blimey, he's always talking about “Yesterday”, you'd think he was Beethoven or somebody' - Paul McCartney

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parlance
Slaggers
7065 Posts
(Offline)
16
13 November 2013 - 3.18pm

vonbontee said
Damn, this is a depressing thread. :(

Certainly not the first. We've gotten pretty deep and somber in the Impossible to Derail thread.

parlance

Beware of sadness. It can hit you. It can hurt you. Make you sore and what is more, that is not what you are here for. - George

Check out my fan video for Paul's song "Appreciate" at Vimeo or YouTube.

mccartneyalarm
243 Posts
(Offline)
17
13 November 2013 - 5.36pm

I'm sorry that happened to you. I think going after a Sgt. Pepper collectible makes sense as it was the first album you heard. There are some Beatles dolls made by Applause that might be nice. I have the whole set of Sgt. Pepper dolls, though they would be out of your price range for all of them. I bought mine piece meal on EBay. Pick your favorite Beatle and buy him. I like them because they are tangible (like "ragdolls"). They also sell a set of plastic Sgt Pepper figures on EBay. You can buy those individually, too. They are not as much as the Applause dolls. Good luck to you. I hope things work out for you.

"And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make."

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BrynnanaPhone
13 Posts
(Offline)
18
13 November 2013 - 5.43pm

The whole shabang. The box set.

Serious business, here.

bnybny
4 Posts
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19
15 November 2013 - 3.44am

The mirror was FOUND!  And the family is fine.  It took a miraculous search on my mom's behalf and a lot of hope.  What he did really isn't cool, knowing that that's the way he reacted is a bit of an eye-opener, but having it found restores a part of me and lets me move on.  So, from a depressing post to one about redemption and advancement.  I think that's pretty good : )

Besides, my pup is having a reaction to a medicine she was just put on.  So getting to focus on making her well brings everybody together.

You're a great, empathetic, impressive and fun group of people.  It was a traumatic way to find all of you, but I'm awfully glad I have.  You'd make remarkable friends!

Thank you all!

(When I'm upset I listen to Lennon, but I can finally move on to Harrison now : )  )

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parlance
Slaggers
7065 Posts
(Offline)
20
15 November 2013 - 6.17am

bnybny said
The mirror was FOUND!  And the family is fine.  It took a miraculous search on my mom's behalf and a lot of hope.  What he did really isn't cool, knowing that that's the way he reacted is a bit of an eye-opener, but having it found restores a part of me and lets me move on.  So, from a depressing post to one about redemption and advancement.  I think that's pretty good : )

Besides, my pup is having a reaction to a medicine she was just put on.  So getting to focus on making her well brings everybody together.

You're a great, empathetic, impressive and fun group of people.  It was a traumatic way to find all of you, but I'm awfully glad I have.  You'd make remarkable friends!

Thank you all!

(When I'm upset I listen to Lennon, but I can finally move on to Harrison now : )  )

 

 

I'm glad it turned out well! Hope the pup recovers quickly. apple01

parlance

Beware of sadness. It can hit you. It can hurt you. Make you sore and what is more, that is not what you are here for. - George

Check out my fan video for Paul's song "Appreciate" at Vimeo or YouTube.

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