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Paul's Americanisms
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9 September 2013
9.30pm
mccartneyalarm
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I agree...we do need a "Questions to ask Funny Paper" thread! Hilarious! Well, I've been rewriting Beatles songs for a couple years now...making birthday cards for Beatles fans friends. My hope has been that Paul would catch wind of it and come to my house personally to serve me with a lawsuit for plagarism! As for the British accent...beyond a doubt...very posh! I am reminded of the play/movie "My Fair Lady..." Either way she spoke, you had to love the accent! And back to the "loo"...we'll have to rewrite "Norwegian Wood" as well as "She Came in Through the Back Loo Window" as John says he "goes off to sleep in the bath". Make that the "loo!"

"And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make."

9 September 2013
9.32pm
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Ahhh Girl
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mccartneyalarm said
...My hope has been that Paul would catch wind of it and come to my house personally to serve me with a lawsuit for plagarism! As for the British accent...beyond a doubt...very posh! I am reminded of the play/movie "My Fair Lady..." Either way she spoke, you had to love the accent! And back to the "loo"...we'll have to rewrite "Norwegian Wood" as well as "She Came in Through the Back Loo Window" as John says he "goes off to sleep in the bath". Make that the "loo!"

hahahahahha!!! However you can get his attention!!!

10 September 2013
2.26am
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Funny Paper
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mccartneyalarm said
I agree...we do need a "Questions to ask Funny Paper" thread! Hilarious! Well, I've been rewriting Beatles songs for a couple years now...making birthday cards for Beatles fans friends. My hope has been that Paul would catch wind of it and come to my house personally to serve me with a lawsuit for plagarism! As for the British accent...beyond a doubt...very posh! I am reminded of the play/movie "My Fair Lady..." Either way she spoke, you had to love the accent! And back to the "loo"...we'll have to rewrite "Norwegian Wood" as well as "She Came in Through the Back Loo Window" as John says he "goes off to sleep in the bath". Make that the "loo!"

She told me she felt like her body was down with the flu

I told her mine wasn't, and crawled off to sleep in the loo...

Faded flowers, wait in a jar, till the evening is complete... complete... complete... complete...
10 September 2013
2.57am
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Ahhh Girl
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That got my giggle box turned upside down! Laughed 'til my sides hurt. Love it.

10 September 2013
3.04am
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Ahhh Girl
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I think I've quit shaking with laughter enough to ask another question.

Why is Jojo from Tucson, Arizona? Along with that question, what's up with him going to California? I'm sure there are places over there with 6 and 4 syllables respectively.

Were they trying to please an American audience to sell more records?

10 September 2013
3.43pm
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fabfouremily
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Maybe you're thinking too much into it? It was probably just the first place that came into his head that fitted, that's all. I don't think their record sales were much of a worry tbh.

Moving along in our God given ways, safety is sat by the fire/Sanctuary from these feverish smiles, left with a mark on the door.

(Passover - I. Curtis)

10 September 2013
4.53pm
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vonbontee
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Funny Paper said

Also, if you have access to itunes, do a search for "rich little politics and popcorn" and have a listen to "Spy Story" -- Rich Little is an American impressionist and that little track is him doing a hilarious impersonation of famous British actors from the old days (like Trevor Howard, Rex Harrison and Michael Redgrave).

Actually, Rich Little is Canadian! (Well, Canadian-born anyways.)

And come on, there were LOTS of reasons to go to California (besides the grass)! Why should Paul change the lyric to the fairly meaningless "Caledonia grass" simply because he's not American?

I remember George saying 'Blimey, he's always talking about “Yesterday”, you'd think he was Beethoven or somebody' - Paul McCartney

10 September 2013
5.14pm
mccartneyalarm
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I think Funny Paper's posts should come with a warning...don't read if you are drinking a beverage of any kind (unless you want to spew it out all over yourself!) Really hilarious! So, I tried to finish the song (though it is nowhere near as funny as Funny Paper's) still hoping Paul will see that I am screwing with his copyrighted material, and he comes to serve with the lawsuit personally!

And, when I awoke, I'm not alone

She's on the throne

So, she had to heave,

It wasn't good, Norwegian Wood

"And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make."

10 September 2013
5.56pm
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Ahhh Girl
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mccartneyalarm said
I think Funny Paper's posts should come with a warning...don't read if you are drinking a beverage of any kind (unless you want to spew it out all over yourself!) Really hilarious! So, I tried to finish the song (though it is nowhere near as funny as Funny Paper's) still hoping Paul will see that I am screwing with his copyrighted material, and he comes to serve with the lawsuit personally!

And, when I awoke, I'm not alone

She's on the throne

So, she had to heave,

It wasn't good, Norwegian Wood

She heaved? Guess she can call in sick and stay home from work and talk to John more. If I were in that girl's shoes, I'd definitely call in sick. Wouldn't have any qualms doing so.

Speaking of spewing...could someone enlighten me on the original story of Zig that started the comments I see everywhere on the forum that go like "I Zigged" "I pulled a Zig" "Unless you want to Zig"?

11 September 2013
12.19am
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Funny Paper
America
Candlestick Park
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mccartneyalarm said
I think Funny Paper's posts should come with a warning...don't read if you are drinking a beverage of any kind (unless you want to spew it out all over yourself!) Really hilarious! So, I tried to finish the song (though it is nowhere near as funny as Funny Paper's) still hoping Paul will see that I am screwing with his copyrighted material, and he comes to serve with the lawsuit personally!

And, when I awoke, I'm not alone

She's on the throne

So, she had to heave,

It wasn't good, Norwegian Wood

Excellent!  I would only change one word, to complete the "heaving" aspect:

"It wasn't good, Norwegian food."

Faded flowers, wait in a jar, till the evening is complete... complete... complete... complete...
11 September 2013
2.26am
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Ahhh Girl
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Funny Paper said

mccartneyalarm said
I think Funny Paper's posts should come with a warning...don't read if you are drinking a beverage of any kind (unless you want to spew it out all over yourself!) Really hilarious! So, I tried to finish the song (though it is nowhere near as funny as Funny Paper's) still hoping Paul will see that I am screwing with his copyrighted material, and he comes to serve with the lawsuit personally!

And, when I awoke, I'm not alone

She's on the throne

So, she had to heave,

It wasn't good, Norwegian Wood

Excellent!  I would only change one word, to complete the "heaving" aspect:

"It wasn't good, Norwegian food."

Barf. hehehehe

Thus the song writing team of Funny Paper and mccartneyalarm is born. Shall we argue now and settle whose name comes first for the credits?

 

 

11 September 2013
3.49am
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Little Piggy Dragonguy
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meanmistermustard said
The UK is miles so its 34 miles to Glasgow, i've never seen a roadsign in kilometres in the UK and wouldn't have a clue how far it referred to. Pounds and ounces are also used and there was a huge fuss when the EU tried to stop greengrocers and butchers from using those and change to kilo's. Most simply ignored the warnings. Same with heights and weights, most folks still go by feet and inches.

Most of those are what we say over here or very well known so its strange to see them be called Americanisms.

This is crazy to me. My whole life, all my elementary school teachers, and science teachers have been saying that America is the only country in the world that doesn't use the metric system and I've always thought that everywhere else only used the metric system.

All living things must abide by the laws of the shape they inhabit
11 September 2013
4.38am
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vonbontee
Inside an Apple Orchard in a Letterbox
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<

Speaking of spewing...could someone enlighten me on the original story of Zig that started the comments I see everywhere on the forum that go like "I Zigged" "I pulled a Zig" "Unless you want to Zig"?

cbatcu, to "Zig" means to spray your computer screen with whatever liquid you're drinking when you read something so hilarious, you immediately expel it with laughter. I think it may have begun in one of the threads where Zig rewrote the lyrics to "Run For Your Life" to include lots of references to bunnies, puppies and other cute things, back in 2010 or so.

I remember George saying 'Blimey, he's always talking about “Yesterday”, you'd think he was Beethoven or somebody' - Paul McCartney

11 September 2013
9.14am
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Funny Paper
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cbatcu said

Funny Paper said

mccartneyalarm said
I think Funny Paper's posts should come with a warning...don't read if you are drinking a beverage of any kind (unless you want to spew it out all over yourself!) Really hilarious! So, I tried to finish the song (though it is nowhere near as funny as Funny Paper's) still hoping Paul will see that I am screwing with his copyrighted material, and he comes to serve with the lawsuit personally!

And, when I awoke, I'm not alone

She's on the throne

So, she had to heave,

It wasn't good, Norwegian Wood

Excellent!  I would only change one word, to complete the "heaving" aspect:

"It wasn't good, Norwegian food."

Barf. hehehehe

Thus the song writing team of Funny Paper and mccartneyalarm is born. Shall we argue now and settle whose name comes first for the credits?

 

 

I'll tell the lawyers to dub us "Paper/Alarm" (aka "McFunny"), and if he runs off with a 4-foot-tall Japanese woman who screeches, I'll sell all the rights to Prince.

Faded flowers, wait in a jar, till the evening is complete... complete... complete... complete...
11 September 2013
3.59pm
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Ahhh Girl
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unknown said

meanmistermustard said
The UK is miles so its 34 miles to Glasgow, i've never seen a roadsign in kilometres in the UK and wouldn't have a clue how far it referred to. Pounds and ounces are also used and there was a huge fuss when the EU tried to stop greengrocers and butchers from using those and change to kilo's. Most simply ignored the warnings. Same with heights and weights, most folks still go by feet and inches.

Most of those are what we say over here or very well known so its strange to see them be called Americanisms.

This is crazy to me. My whole life, all my elementary school teachers, and science teachers have been saying that America is the only country in the world that doesn't use the metric system and I've always thought that everywhere else only used the metric system.

Thank you, unknown, for the confirmation. That's what my teachers always told me too. Glad you chimed in!

11 September 2013
4.07pm
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Ahhh Girl
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vonbontee said

<

Speaking of spewing...could someone enlighten me on the original story of Zig that started the comments I see everywhere on the forum that go like "I Zigged" "I pulled a Zig" "Unless you want to Zig"?

cbatcu, to "Zig" means to spray your computer screen with whatever liquid you're drinking when you read something so hilarious, you immediately expel it with laughter. I think it may have begun in one of the threads where Zig rewrote the lyrics to "Run For Your Life" to include lots of references to bunnies, puppies and other cute things, back in 2010 or so.

me: "Paul, have you ever Zigged?"

Paul: "Well, there was this one time, you see. Me and John, we were working on this song. We had the paper there in front of us on the table, like that you see. We both had pens and we would each write down a line as it came to us. Then. I still laugh when I think about it. George, Ringo, and George Martin all broke wind at the same time in the studio. Me and John both Zigged on the paper with the lyrics. By the time we all quit laughing, the ink on part of the paper was all smeared. Neither John or me could remember the words we had written. So we said "Fook it. We will just put some aaahhhs in there and keep going. Perhaps you know the song? It's called "A Day In The Life.""

X-posted in the "Questions you'd ask Paul if you could interview him" thread.

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11 September 2013
4.34pm
mccartneyalarm
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Unquestionably, Funny Paper deserves all the glory with rewriting Beatles lyrics! (I do like Paper/Alarm or McFunny, though!...hilarious!) However, I must insist that we use my address on future collaborations so Paul can serve me personally with the copyright infringement lawsuit. I'll be happy to give you half or even 2/3 the credit, but I insist he puts the handcuffs on me! (giggle)

"And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make."

11 September 2013
6.52pm
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Funny Paper
America
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mccartneyalarm said
Unquestionably, Funny Paper deserves all the glory with rewriting Beatles lyrics! (I do like Paper/Alarm or McFunny, though!...hilarious!) However, I must insist that we use my address on future collaborations so Paul can serve me personally with the copyright infringement lawsuit. I'll be happy to give you half or even 2/3 the credit, but I insist he puts the handcuffs on me! (giggle)

I heard Paul quit his job at the police department and got himself a steady job -- Bounty Hunter (he moonlights as a rock star).

Faded flowers, wait in a jar, till the evening is complete... complete... complete... complete...
11 September 2013
6.54pm
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Ahhh Girl
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Funny Paper said

mccartneyalarm said
Unquestionably, Funny Paper deserves all the glory with rewriting Beatles lyrics! (I do like Paper/Alarm or McFunny, though!...hilarious!) However, I must insist that we use my address on future collaborations so Paul can serve me personally with the copyright infringement lawsuit. I'll be happy to give you half or even 2/3 the credit, but I insist he puts the handcuffs on me! (giggle)

I heard Paul quit his job at the police department and got himself a steady job -- Bounty Hunter (he moonlights as a rock star).

Well played, Funny Paper, well played! So fitting!

 

11 September 2013
9.12pm
mccartneyalarm
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That was so good, Funny Paper...I just may let Paul arrest you after all!!!! Too funny! I defer to your greatness.

"And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make."

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