Was John Lennon Bisexual? | Page 10 | Fab Forum | The Beatles Bible

Paul’s typewritten note was validated by forensics conducted by Scotland Yard — from the report dated 12 May, 1968:

“Sgt. Hatherfordshire noted a call to the residence of Mr. Paul McCartney at Cavendish Ave. where Ms. Ono presented officers Worcestershire and Gallumphries with the typewritten paper in question.  Preliminary dusting revealed the sheet had brick matter matched to the same brick Mr. John Lennon allegedly used to shatter the window on the southeast side by the garage.  “Franny” Schwartz confirmed this, but Mr. Lennon, who was present, protested that he would not throw that brick until 1970, almost two years in the future.  “Put that in your pipe and smoke it, ya bobbers…!” he is reported to have said.  The officers then had to restrain Mr. McCartney from french-kissing Mr. Lennon as they grappled in seemingly friendly fashion upon the snooker-table in the parlor.  It was deemed suitable to call in MI-6 at that point…”

Yes — “CSI: Abbey Road .“

Or:

“Law and Order: SBU (Special Beatles Unit)“

“CSI: Abbey Road .“

Episode #1:

Detectives Mackenzie and Rigby (played by Ian Holm and Diana Rigg) at the crime scene — the famous crosswalk outside Abbey Road studios.

Mackenzie: What are we doing here?

Rigby: We’re dusting for prints — we had to stop traffic all day.

Mackenzie: Prints of what?

Rigby: The Paul McCartney double, which will give us clues about the murder of the original Paul back in 1968.

Mackenzie: You can lift prints all these years later?

Rigby: Yes, our advanced technology allows us to detect bare footprints left on asphalt up to 50 years in the past, though of course our lab techs will have quite a job sorting out the thousands if not millions of superadded prints on top of that.

Unnamed Officer:  Detectives! I think I’ve found something!

Rigby: What is it?

Unnamed Officer [pointing with his stylus on the ground]: It looks like cigarette ash…

Mackenzie: From Paul’s cigarette?

Rigby: We’ll have to take it back to the lab to make sure…  [carefully lifts a portion of ash with her popsicle stick to her nose and takes a whiff]  It doesn’t seem to smell like Paul’s brand, Woodbine filterless…

Mackenzie: But if we’re dealing with the Paul imposter here, wouldn’t he have taken pains to use the same brand as the real Paul?

Rigby: Unless he is just that dastardly, to try to fool us by doing what we don’t expect!

Mackenzie [turning to Sherlock Holmes, who happens by at that moment]: Inspector Holmes, what do you make of this business…?

Sherlock Holmes:  As I noted during The Case of The Ahhs in A Day In The Life , “once you have ruled out the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth!”

Mackenzie: Very sound counsel, Inspector Holmes!

Sherlock Holmes: And otherwise, if you find yourself at logger’s end, I always find it fruitfully conducive to boil up a 7% solution of cocaine, inject it into a blue vein in the forearm, and sit back to listen to a Grammaphone disk of an early recording of Glass Onion .

Wholey poop this thread is still going.  

Let me show you a thing…

That is all.