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Unfinished Music No 1: Two Virgins
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24 September 2010
3.34am
Happy Nat
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vonbontee said:

Elsewhere Man said:

I bought all the “Unfinished Music” albums when they got released on CD. I listened to each of them once and promptly sold them. They're crap.


I think “Unfinished Music #2: Life With The Lions ” is pretty good, as far as that sort of thing goes. I used to listen to a lot of noisy avant-garde jazz stuff, so I have a taste for it.  I'll definitely never play it more than once a year though! 

And “Two Virgins ” is indeed pretty terrible. I intend to hear “The Wedding Album ” someday.


Lennon quote: Avant-garde is French for bullshit.

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24 September 2010
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Joe
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I listened to them all while writing the John Lennon section. For what it’s worth, here’s my verdict.

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24 September 2010
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Joe said:

Wasn't there a big white strip (no pun intended) placed over his *ahem* family jewels, though?


Joe it actually came wrapped in a brown grocery-bag-type cover over the album slick. (see a pic of my covered copy here).

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24 September 2010
3.43pm
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Joe
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I was talking about the picture of Paul on the White Album poster.

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4 October 2010
3.36am
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Was two Virgins a Yoko reissue or a Lennon reissue

As if it matters how a man falls down.'

'When the fall's all that's left, it matters a great deal.

4 October 2010
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What do you mean by a John/Yoko reissue? It was originally credited to John Lennon and Yoko Ono.

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6 October 2010
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Was it released with Yoko’s Back catologue or John’s

As if it matters how a man falls down.'

'When the fall's all that's left, it matters a great deal.

6 October 2010
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They were reissued on Rykodisc in '97 along with the Yoko stuff – even the catalogue numbers are sequential, although the spine credits them to either “Yoko Ono” or “John Lennon /Yoko Ono”, depending.

No doubt Ryko figured that anyone who liked Yoko's music would maybe be interested in hearing the JohnandYoko, uh, music.  (Anyone who liked John's music?…not so much!)

GEORGE: In fact, The Detroit Sound. JOHN: In fact, yes. GEORGE: In fact, yeah. Tamla-Motown artists are our favorites. The Miracles. JOHN: We like Marvin Gaye. GEORGE: The Impressions PAUL & GEORGE: Mary Wells. GEORGE: The Exciters. RINGO: Chuck Jackson. JOHN: To name but eighty. 

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7 October 2010
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The cover is as Iconic as any Beatles album except the really big ones like Sgt. Pepper or Abbey Road – though granted no one listens to it.  It was the first time a mainstream artist like John had ever appeared full frontal naked- another first for John!

I mean, obviously they were naked because they felt born again with their new found love.  It's a shame the record itself is not that great- even Yoko doesn't have high regard of the content these days.  I don't look upon them as sexual so I have no problem with the nudity, I think some people expect for want it to be erotic and it's certainly not that at all.

7 October 2010
5.29pm
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I agree with you, Ochdeus, it stands as an iconic album cover–and you gotta love the title–but still, at the time, can't you imagine the rest of the Beatles looking at each other and rolling their eyes…..”John's gone and done it again….”

(When I was a kid (a million years ago), I heard that the White Album had the plain cover because that picture was underneath it, covered up like a Butcher Cover album…..ha!)

two-virginsa-hard-days-night-paul-6

20 April 2013
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I really wish I hadn’t seen the cover, ever! There are some things 5th graders should NOT be seeing.

And that concludes my presentation on why the internet isn’t safe.

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20 April 2013
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Beatles in the Blood said
I really wish I hadn’t seen the cover, ever! There are some things 5th graders should NOT be seeing.

And that concludes my presentation on why the internet isn’t safe.

Bahaha a-hard-days-night-ringo-8

I don’t think I could come to terms in ever listening to it. I mean if its like Revolution #9 with other noises of them doing *it*, no thanks.

 

20 April 2013
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I’ve pulled a good few pranks on people leaving the Two Virgins album cover as a desktop wallpaper MWAHAHAHA The looks of terror on their faces :D

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20 April 2013
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AppleScruffJunior said
I’ve pulled a good few pranks on people leaving the Two Virgins album cover as a desktop wallpaper MWAHAHAHA The looks of horror terror on their faces :D

 

I’m going to use that, but knowing my friends they’ll probably going to like seeing naked people. This is the main reason I hang out here than with my real friends, virtual ones are less, I don’t know.

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20 April 2013
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Beatles in the Blood said

AppleScruffJunior said
I’ve pulled a good few pranks on people leaving the Two Virgins album cover as a desktop wallpaper MWAHAHAHA The looks of horror terror on their faces :D

 

I’m going to use that, but knowing my friends they’ll probably going to like seeing naked people. This is the main reason I hang out here than with my real friends, virtual ones are less, I don’t know.

 

 

 

Oh no I’m probably as equally dirty-minded as your friends, I just don’t show it on the internet :P  

 

 

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28 March 2015
8.19pm
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Listening to this for the first time in 3-4 years because why not?

SIDE ONE:

John: …it’s very hard making it (in) television, you’ve got to superimpose (?)
Yoko: (laughs)

We get a few minutes of tape and electronic distortion, and what sounds like bird imitations accompanying actual bird fx. Quite a bit of nauseating echo. Much pre-recorded vocals played back at half-speed, sounding like an avant-garde opera. All of this will abruptly stop or fade away but recur throughout. Some nice atmospheric piano from John, and Yoko begins to do her thing. Now it gets fun: John does a quick imitation of (I think) a carnival tout, including (I think) an actual crown-and-anchor wheel sound effect. And then plays an exaggerately-stiff march that starts out atonally but impressively resolves into an almost Celtic-sounding theme. Some more screaming from J&Y in their respective styles, and then one of those old crooning records starts to play (full detail on Joe’s main page) as they do a little play-acting.

Yoko: What’s that (?) ?
John: It’s me, honey, putting the fire out!
Yoko: What’s that smell? What’s that smell?
John: I’ve just come home for tea, honey.

They chant the word “yes” for awhile, Yoko practicing her vibrato, John amusingly butting in at one point.
 

Yoko: Who’s theeeeerrrrrrrreeeee? Is that you? Is that you? Hey there!
John: (hammering something) Argh! No fucking (?) up there, you see? [EDIT: It’s “tin opener”]
Yoko: Who’s theeeeerrrrrrrrrrrreeeereeeeeeeeearrar?
John: It’s just me, ‘ilda, I’m home for tea.
Yoko: Your tea’s ready. Help yourself.
John: Well, thank you kindly.
Yoko: Tea’s never readyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. Neeeever! Never never never never never were!

John accompanies this last bit with some low grumbling and moaning into the mic, then “‘Scuse me…thank you.” End of side one.

SIDE TWO:

(forget it, a better description can be found here https://books.google.ca/books?id=LdsMqbAQJWgC&pg=PA167&lpg=PA167&dq=yoko+%22two+virgins%22+tea&source=bl&ots=xG9ziFRWqp&sig=857GU3auWLUzCRLSsscVmFSs8ys&hl=en&sa=X&ei=1g0XVcXDPNGkyATj4IHQBg&ved=0CEgQ6AEwBw#v=onepage&q=two%20virgins&f=false and elsewhere. I wouldn’t have written all that if I’d known it’d been transcribed online already.) I do like some of interaction between Yoko’s shrieks and glottal exercises and the records that John keeps playing (and playing with, messing with the speed controls.) Nice finish, with the piano and vocal drone, John reciting something unintelligible until the closing “amen!”

 

Not as bad as I remembered. Bits of it will still hold the attention for several seconds at a time, if you’re bored. (It somewhat stands in relation to the early Yoko albums as the Beatles Xmas recordings are to the Beatles’ albums, maybe.) Also, that tea-with-Hilda bit could almost be an avant-garde parody of a Python bit. Still only gets a 4/10 from me, but I could’ve gone as high as 5.5/10 if the recording quality wasn’t so painful to my ears. (I value intelligibility a lot.)

Paul: Yeah well… first of all, we’re bringing out a ‘Stamp Out Detroit’ campaign.

         

28 March 2015
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[above post edited]

GEORGE: In fact, The Detroit Sound. JOHN: In fact, yes. GEORGE: In fact, yeah. Tamla-Motown artists are our favorites. The Miracles. JOHN: We like Marvin Gaye. GEORGE: The Impressions PAUL & GEORGE: Mary Wells. GEORGE: The Exciters. RINGO: Chuck Jackson. JOHN: To name but eighty. 

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28 March 2015
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vonbontee said
[above post edited]

How do you know? Did Von Bontee tell you to post as he was unable to do?

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28 March 2015
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Not as bad as I remembered. Bits of it will still hold the attention for several seconds at a time, if you’re bored.

That’s being very kind. I don’t mind the Wedding Album or Life With The Lions too much but this one is, in my opinion, poor by comparison.

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2 April 2015
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Well, I’m glad I re-read this thread, because I’ve been thinking about getting “Two Virgins ” on vinyl, just for the sake of completing my collection of Lennon albums. I think I might actually pass on that, completism be damned. Or maybe I’ll just find one of those counterfeit reissues for $10 and call it good. 

Not a bit like Cagney.

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