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Why Don't You Play 'Imagine' On The White Piano, John?- Klaus Voormann
10 July 2015
3.42pm
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AppleScruffJunior
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As you all know this book was only ever published in German and my German is decent enough that I decided to offer my translation skills to translate this book, chapter by chapter and share it with the forum members.

Thanks to 'The Man', I can only distribute the text through PM and anyone who wants to be put on the mailing list can just PM me now or whatnot, if you've said you wanted to be sent it can you please send me another PM again because as we all know my memory is like a sieve that has been shot about 50 times :/

I aim to do a chapter a week and I'll make sure to post a reason here if I amn't able to post my chapter on time or for any other reason.

I'll try to translate it as accurately as I can, use phrases/words that are universally understood  and keep the prose as lively and interesting as possible. The book is also illustrated with artwork from Klaus and other photos from his private collection and I'll try and find them and post them online along with the chapters.

 

This thread can be the discussion thread, where you can critique me or ask me any questions about what Klaus was saying or whatever 🙂

Those who PM within 24 hours get a free foreword from Paul McCartney that begin with the words "Klaus Voormann is an asshole..."

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INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately....in your own homes!

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Make Love, Not Wardrobes!

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"Stop throwing jelly beans at me"- George Harrison

10 July 2015
4.42pm
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I'll also do little footnote things on this thread just so I don't have to type them out in every PM, these will mostly relate to pictures I think but we'll see as it goes on.

The photo that I used in the dedication is not the same as the one in the original text because despite much scouring I couldn't find it online. However the picture that I did use is from the same time period and the clothes that the person is wearing are practically the same in the original photo as well. Klaus does talk about it later on in the book so I'll continue searching for it online but if push comes to shove, I'll scan it (if I break the spine in doing so I'm going to kill you all....just kidding a-hard-days-night-paul-4ahdn_paul_02a-hard-days-night-paul-4ahdn_paul_01).

 

Hope you all enjoy it 🙂

 

INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately....in your own homes!

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Make Love, Not Wardrobes!

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"Stop throwing jelly beans at me"- George Harrison

10 July 2015
4.43pm
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That sounds interesting.  I will PM AppleScruffs, especially after I found a little taste of the book from someone online who translated one page of it:

http://thateventuality.tumblr......manns-book

Klaus seems to have an eye for observation of personal and seemingly small (but interesting) details, rather than the usual tedious "biography" format of conventional books.

A ginger sling with a pineapple heart,

a coffee dessert, yes you know it's good news...

10 July 2015
4.58pm
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^Klaus' autobiography is really original and probably the best autobiography I've ever read (and I've read a good few), he presumes that you know a bit about The Beatles so he doesn't repeat the information that everyone knows instead he tells unique, little anecdotes that are often very funny and/or very sad or poignant (especially his memories of George).

And if it's been a while since I've posted a chapter, feel free to PM me to ask what's going on or when is the next one out (I won't take offense), it'll push me to do more of it so you'll end up getting the chapter quicker.

I aim to have Chapter 1 done and sent out by Monday/Tuesday.

 

INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately....in your own homes!

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Make Love, Not Wardrobes!

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"Stop throwing jelly beans at me"- George Harrison

10 July 2015
5.04pm
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"Klaus' autobiography is really original and probably the best autobiography I've ever read (and I've read a good few), he presumes that you know a bit about The Beatles so he doesn't repeat the information that everyone knows instead he tells unique, little anecdotes that are often very funny and/or very sad or poignant (especially his memories of George)."

That whets my appetite even more!  Schönen Dank!

A ginger sling with a pineapple heart,

a coffee dessert, yes you know it's good news...

10 July 2015
5.13pm
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Pineapple Records said
"Klaus' autobiography is really original and probably the best autobiography I've ever read (and I've read a good few), he presumes that you know a bit about The Beatles so he doesn't repeat the information that everyone knows instead he tells unique, little anecdotes that are often very funny and/or very sad or poignant (especially his memories of George)."

That whets my appetite even more!  Schönen Dank!

 

Bitte schön!

 

INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately....in your own homes!

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Make Love, Not Wardrobes!

                ***

"Stop throwing jelly beans at me"- George Harrison

10 July 2015
5.13pm
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Beatlebug
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Just want to say thank you so much for doing this, ASJ. heart I only hope it won't demand too much time or whatever. It can technically be considered educational and not just a labour of love, right? a-hard-days-night-john-6 

The table of contents is brilliant already

Ch. 11: 'My name is George Harrison of the Beatles, can you please lend me thirty thousand pounds?' 

paul_HAA-1.gif

and the dedication made me a bit teary... a-hard-days-night-paul-10

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It verges from the sublime to the ridiculote

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10 July 2015
5.17pm
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Silly Girl said
Just want to say thank you so much for doing this, @AppleScruffJunior. heart I only hope it won't demand too much time or whatever. It can technically be considered educational and not just a labour of love, right? a-hard-days-night-john-6 

The table of contents is brilliant already

Ch. 11: 'My name is George Harrison of the Beatles, can you please lend me thirty thousand pounds?' 

paul_HAA-1.gif

and the dedication made me a bit teary... a-hard-days-night-paul-10

That's my excuse for using the computer excessively "but I'm revising German mam".

On another note: For anyone who is learning German I strongly advise you to get this book. Klaus uses "relatively basic" German but he taught me brilliant adjectives and colloquial expressions that I can use to make me sound like "a real-live German" as my German teacher lovingly puts it. He also has a really nice prose style and his writing is quite poetic which is refreshing for "another" musician's autobiography.

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INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately....in your own homes!

                 ***

Make Love, Not Wardrobes!

                ***

"Stop throwing jelly beans at me"- George Harrison

10 July 2015
5.23pm
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AppleScruffJunior said

<trim>
That's my excuse for using the computer excessively "but I'm revising German mam".
<snip>

I confess I have used similar excuses in the past: 'Oh, I need my laptop back so I can, you know, work on my writing. And... stuff. (Like visit the Beatles Bible and watch hilarious Beatles interviews on YouTube and email my friends about my latest Harrisong obsession and...)' a-hard-days-night-ringo-6 

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10 July 2015
5.56pm
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Ah, supertoll! Ich frohe mich darauf, das Buch zu lesen! I want to read that foreword more than anything -- PM coming your way beatlemaniacs_02_gif

Formerly Known As JPM-Fangirl --Paul-Badge.png 2016

'Out There' - 07-06-2015 - Ziggo Dome Amsterdam -- 'One On One' - 12-06-2016 - Pinkpop Festival Landgraaf

10 July 2015
6.08pm
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AppleScruffJunior
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Vielen Dank!

Jetzt Freunde, bin ich total muede und ich will ins Bett gehen. Am Morgen schicke ich die andere PMs- sie haben bis rund 22:00 eine PM zu schicken um dem Vorwart zu bekommen.

Bis dann.

Right, I'm wrecked so I'm going to go to bed. I'll be gone in the morning (GMT) so I'll send out any other PMs out in the afternoon. 

 

INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately....in your own homes!

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Make Love, Not Wardrobes!

                ***

"Stop throwing jelly beans at me"- George Harrison

12 July 2015
5.11pm
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AppleScruffJunior
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I was at a friend's house yesterday so I didn't get started until this evening and it is so difficult to make Klaus and George not look like they're lovers. I swear to God , the words Klaus chose, it makes it sound like they're going over for a fun time rather than for a catch-up so I'm sorry if the Prologue reads like homoerotic fanfiction a-hard-days-night-paul-7

The majority of you will also have seen I think slightly more than half of this already as I posted it around Christmas time on the Fiendish Thingies' page, so sorry if it feels like you're reading the same thing twice but I did spruce up this translation/did a better job than the original one I posted here so meh...

Also it looks like it's going to be out either Tuesday afternoon or evening but who knows I might get a burst of energy tomorrow and have it done in the afternoon, we'll wait and see 🙂

Actually doing this has been quite productive for me as not only am I revising German but I'm actually bothering to listen to all of Wings' albums for once so I'm killing two birds with one stone!

 

And thanks for all the PMs so far heart

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INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately....in your own homes!

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"Stop throwing jelly beans at me"- George Harrison

13 July 2015
2.41am
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Shamrock Womlbs
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Well, this is gonna be great...love the prologue so far!

 

Thx so much!

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"I Need You by George Harrison"

14 July 2015
4.18pm
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Bear with me lads and lassies, I'll 90% have it put out tonight but I have 4 pages left to do and it takes a f**k load of time to get a page done and I need to reread over it and I'll probably do a few changes there so sometime between 12am-1am GMT is when it should be in your inboxes and if you don't get it by 1:30am I've most likely fallen asleep so feel free to send me criticizing PMs.

 

Edit: And I'm just finished George's deportation experience and now I'm sad a-hard-days-night-paul-7

 

INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately....in your own homes!

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Make Love, Not Wardrobes!

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"Stop throwing jelly beans at me"- George Harrison

14 July 2015
5.21pm
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There's no requirement for you to get it done tonight. If its not then we get it tomorrow and we will be just as happy.

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14 July 2015
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No hurries at all. 

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14 July 2015
6.51pm
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I'm done- so expect your PMs in a couple of minutes. There are a few things I want to point out before hand though;

1) For some idiotic reason I mistakenly titled Paul's letter 'Prologue' when it was actually the foreword- I even wrote it as that at the top of the page so I don't know why I wrote 'Prologue', anyhoo the thing you're receiving now is the prologue.

2) While you're reading this bit you might be saying "where the hell is she going with this, it jumps from one bit to the next and then back again", Klaus' wife actually typed this while Klaus spoke it out loud so that's why I think it's a bit all over the place as regards structure, t'is not my fault. Also there was some very long chunks of text where there were no paragraphs where (I think) there should be, so I inserted them in anyway, the same as some punctuation and I connected some sentences together as well. He also inserts sentences that kind of negatively stand out at the end of a paragraph but there was nothing I could do with them so they stayed the same e.g. the 'Olivia buying tea' one. I also changed some of his descriptions to make them more understandable for a non-German person and I took out his referring to Olivia as "eye candy" and changed it to something nicer because really Klaus...really a-hard-days-night-paul-11

3) This prologue I am happy to say has all the correct photos in it and I'll post a picture of the SPOILER FOR THE PROLOGUE:

The new painting of Paul here, personally I prefer the George one, but then I would say that, wouldn't I a-hard-days-night-george-10

download.jpgImage Enlarger

8912331f6b7d18738a3245b826db47dd.jpgImage Enlarger

4) Klaus refers to George as being sixteen years old when he was in Hamburg, when he was actually seventeen but I kept it in anyways.

 

And I think that's it. Hope you all enjoy it and feel free to provide feedback through PM or on the discussion forum.

I think I'll have the next chapter by Sunday as it's a fairly longish one.

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INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately....in your own homes!

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Make Love, Not Wardrobes!

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"Stop throwing jelly beans at me"- George Harrison

14 July 2015
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Not to sound ungrateful, but we're not allowed to proofread/edit/Grammar Nazi it, are we? a-hard-days-night-paul-4 We're only allowed to just read and enjoy it, right?  a-hard-days-night-george-9

Because I can turn my settings to 'Grammar Nazi-- Off', if you really insist. a-hard-days-night-george-10

 

Seriously though, great stuff so far! Best quote ever about Dhani talking too much. 

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14 July 2015
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Thanks again to AppleScruffJunior!

Yeah, I can be a Proofing Nazi too, like Silly Girl mentioned; but for this I kind of turn it off (unless AppleScruffJunior (ASJ) wants that degree of input).  Interesting insights from a more human everyday perspective from Klaus.  And fascinating off-the-cuff mentions of things I never knew (e.g., Paul put into prison in Hamburg).

One thing I would say, if I may: ASJ mentioned she changed "eye candy" because she didn't like that (presumably to "she always looked stunning").  I hope ASJ doesn't do that too much; it seems rather ideologically severe.  Even if I agree with the ideological judgement in question, I believe in the sanctity of primary sources texts, no matter how much some part of the text might put me off... but I guess "beggars can't be choosers"...

One interesting detail in the translation to me was "I knew only too well that he could get into such a tizzy over his worrying for me that he would probably send out a search troop for me."

Am I correct that the term "search troop" is a British expression?  In America, we would say "search party".  It always amuses me how the British have a different term for practically everything, contrasted to the American.

A ginger sling with a pineapple heart,

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15 July 2015
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Silly Girl said
Not to sound ungrateful, but we're not allowed to proofread/edit/Grammar Nazi it, are we? a-hard-days-night-paul-4 We're only allowed to just read and enjoy it, right?  a-hard-days-night-george-9

Because I can turn my settings to 'Grammar Nazi-- Off', if you really insist. a-hard-days-night-george-10

Ah bollocks, I guess I should cut out the midnight typing sessions then >.> 

I  think I'll do my proof-reading during the day so I'm not as bloody tired and wanting to go to bed (as I was last night ahdn_paul_01) so hopefully you won't see any further booboos.

I have a strong belief in never looking over something once I've submitted it so I'll revise it once I've finished everything else (speaking of which if any once wants the PDF at the end of this whole thing, you're welcome to send me your email either now or when I'm finished and I promise I won't sell it on to Nigerian princes ahdn_paul_02a-hard-days-night-paul-4a-hard-days-night-george-4). but feel free to post my failures (I mean if I can't be perfect in my mother tongue how am I expected to be any good at other languages a-hard-days-night-paul-11 )

And wow that was a lot of smileys!

Pineapple Records said
Thanks again to AppleScruffJunior!

Yeah, I can be a Proofing Nazi too, like Silly Girl mentioned; but for this I kind of turn it off (unless AppleScruffJunior (ASJ) wants that degree of input).  Interesting insights from a more human everyday perspective from Klaus.  And fascinating off-the-cuff mentions of things I never knew (e.g., Paul put into prison in Hamburg).

One thing I would say, if I may: ASJ mentioned she changed "eye candy" because she didn't like that (presumably to "she always looked stunning").  I hope ASJ doesn't do that too much; it seems rather ideologically severe.  Even if I agree with the ideological judgement in question, I believe in the sanctity of primary sources texts, no matter how much some part of the text might put me off... but I guess "beggars can't be choosers"...

The word he used was 'Augenweide' which literally means 'feast for the eyes' (which is quite a nice phrase), I knew what it meant (I was going to say from previous experiences with a winkey face but then I remembered I get more crude phrases ahdn_paul_01) but I like to double, triple check things just to see what other dictionaries and native Germans think would be a suitable translation, one of them, "eye-candy" I thought was more of a juvenile word and not something that would befit the 65 year old man he was at the time he wrote it so I changed it to "stunning". Also we wouldn't really say 'feast for the eyes' in English so I changed it to '"stunning" for that reason as well.

It's what is awkward about German, one word means so many things and don't even start with the describing John paragraph and the bankruptcy paragraph, oh holy sweet Jesus, doing those 5 lines or whatever they were almost drove me mad, WHAT THE HELL IS HE TRYING TO SAY?!?

Wow that above paragraph is the perfect excellent example of word vomiting onto a page.

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INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately....in your own homes!

                 ***

Make Love, Not Wardrobes!

                ***

"Stop throwing jelly beans at me"- George Harrison

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