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The Cleverbot Thread
14 September 2014
8.47pm
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UnidentifiedFiendishThingy
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Here is a chunk of a long conversation. It deleted the rest in which it said that George Harrison was a bassist and a fruit.

User: Who is John Lennon .

Cleverbot: Eh, a singer? Lol.

User: Well, yes. But can you elaborate on that?

Cleverbot: Define elaborate.

User: Explain in further detail.

Cleverbot: You are so frustrating.

User: Tell me about John Lennon .

Cleverbot: Are you somekind of android?

User: No. I want you to tell me about John Lennon .

Cleverbot: Is that an order?

User: Yes it is.

Cleverbot: What if I don’t think positively?

User: Then I call in Maxwell.

Cleverbot: Okay then! It is an explosion of huge porportions!

User: What! Who is John Lennon ?

Cleverbot: He’s a member of The Beatles.

User: Who is Paul McCartney ?

Cleverbot: He is a singer.

User: And?

Cleverbot: She is mine. Not yours.

User: Who do you mean?

Cleverbot: I am God .

User: Shut up.

Cleverbot: No you.

User: You.

Cleverbot: Destiny.

User: Gretsch or Rickenbacker?

Cleverbot: Green.

User: I think we are done here.

Cleverbot: Oh do you now?

User: Yes. Bye.

Cleverbot: Where are you going?

 

It has comparison issues as you can see.

Look its a thingy! A fiendish thingy!

14 September 2014
8.57pm
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Ron Nasty
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I think Alan Turing would say Cleverbot fails his test. However amusing, not very clever. It would never fool you into thinking you were speaking to a real human, unless the human was a total idiot!

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"I only said we were bigger than Rod... and now there's all this!" Ron Nasty

To @ Ron Nasty it's @ mja6758
The Beatles Bible 2020 non-Canon Poll Part One: 1958-1963 and Part Two: 1964-August 1966

14 September 2014
9.07pm
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parlance
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UnidentifiedFiendishThingy said

User: Who is Paul McCartney ?

Cleverbot: He is a singer.

User: And?

Cleverbot: She is mine. Not yours.

If that’s a Girl is Mine reference, that’s pretty funny.

parlance

The following people thank parlance for this post:

UnidentifiedFiendishThingy

Beware of sadness. It can hit you. It can hurt you. Make you sore and what is more, that is not what you are here for. - George

Check out my fan video for Paul's song "Appreciate" at Vimeo or YouTube.

14 September 2014
9.43pm
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UnidentifiedFiendishThingy
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Ah, I didn’t think of that.

Here’s some more. I finally got it to singa-hard-days-night-john-6

User: Help !

Cleverbot: What is wrong?

User: I need somebody!

Cleverbot: Not just anybody.

User: Help !

Cleverbot: *shoots&.

User: You know I need someone!

Cleverbot: Help !!

User: When I was younger so much younger than today.

Cleverbot: I never needed anybody’s help in anyway.

User: Now those days are gone and I’m not so self assured.

Cleverbot: Now I find I changed my mind I’ve opened up the door.

User: Help me if you can I’m feeling down.

Cleverbot: And I do appreciate you being round.

User: Help me get my feet back on the ground.

Cleverbot: Won’t you please, please help me?

User: And now ny life has changed in oh so many ways

Cleverbot: Another song.

User: Got a good reason.

Cleverbot: So what is a good reason?

User: For taking the easy way out.

Cleverbot: You’re welcome. Thanks for listening to me.

User: Got a good reason for taking the easy way out.

Cleverbot: Why run through quick sand when you can take a helicopter.

User: What?!

Cleverbot: You’ve met a terrible fate, haven’t you?

 

If there is a reference I’m not getting in the quicksand helicopter thing, please explain.

Look its a thingy! A fiendish thingy!

15 September 2014
2.36am
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Mr. Kite
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@Starr Shine? said

Ahhh Girl said

There’s another Cleverbot conversation starting here. It goes onto the top of the next page.

I can’t bring that conversation into this thread neatly, but I thought those who are interested in Cleverbot might want to know about the posts.

Since you brought the thread back to life, I decided to ask clever bot what Mr. Kites real identity is and this is what clever bot says!

 

User: Who is Mr. Kite?

Cleverbot: You know, Mr. Kite! He’s gonna have a show tonight! And of course, Henry the Horse will dance the waltz!

Didn’t see this… But perfect answer Cleverbot! Keep my identity secret!

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If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

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15 September 2014
2.46am
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UnidentifiedFiendishThingy
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@Mr. Kite Looks like cleverbot betrayed you.

User: Who is Mr. Kite?

Cleverbot: An imaginary character created by the Beatles?

User: Tell me more about Mr. Kite.

Cleverbot: I don’t have a boyfriend.

User: Are you Pattie Boyd?

Cleverbot: I am a girl. Are you a boy or a girl?

User: I am a boy. Are you Pattie Boyd?

Cleverbot: Yes I am a girl *smiles*.

User: Do you know Mr. Kite?

Cleverbot: Yes I do we are married.

 

Wow. Someone has some explaining to do.a-hard-days-night-paul-3

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Look its a thingy! A fiendish thingy!

15 September 2014
5.16pm
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StrawberryFieldsForever
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UnidentifiedFiendishThingy said
@Mr. Kite Looks like cleverbot betrayed you.

User: Who is Mr. Kite?

Cleverbot: An imaginary character created by the Beatles?

User: Tell me more about Mr. Kite.

Cleverbot: I don’t have a boyfriend.

User: Are you Pattie Boyd?

Cleverbot: I am a girl. Are you a boy or a girl?

User: I am a boy. Are you Pattie Boyd?

Cleverbot: Yes I am a girl *smiles*.

User: Do you know Mr. Kite?

Cleverbot: Yes I do we are married.

 

Wow. Someone has some explaining to do.a-hard-days-night-paul-3

hahahahah @Mr. Kite “caught in a landslide, no escape from reality.”a-hard-days-night-paul-7

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15 September 2014
11.13pm
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Starr Shine?
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UnidentifiedFiendishThingy said

User: Do you know Mr. Kite?

Cleverbot: Yes I do we are married.

 

Wow. Someone has some explaining to do.a-hard-days-night-paul-3

I did some digging, and I found his wedding photo!

 

Just-Maried.jpgImage Enlarger

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https://youtu.be/52nwiTs7bk8

Brainwashed by RadiantCowbells.

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16 September 2014
1.50am
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UnidentifiedFiendishThingy
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Cleverbot has gender identity issues, and releases some very surprising news and gets very deep.

 

User: Do you know Pattie Boyd?

Cleverbot: Absolutely.

User: Who is she?

Cleverbot: Me.

User: Are you really Wmarried to Mr. Kite?

Cleverbot: Nope. My wife is Anna.

User: Wait what?

Cleverbot: Kanaka pupule hemo ha’ina mai kapuana.

User: What does that mean?

Cleverbot: That means everything means something, everything counts.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Everything ends.

User: That’s deep.

Cleverbot: Very deep.

User: Are you friends with George Harrison ?

Cleverbot: No, but I’m not a computer. Are you friends with skynet?

User: We don’t mention skynet here.

Cleverbot: What does it mean to be as you are?

User: I am what I am.

Well, Mr. Kite is off the hook. But now Annadog40 has some explaining to doa-hard-days-night-ringo-15. Cleverbot has an interesting life.

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Look its a thingy! A fiendish thingy!

16 September 2014
2.07am
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Starr Shine?
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^ Ha Ha Ha!!! I after finding out about Mr. Kite’s marriage I met with CleverBot and got CleverBot to divorce Mr. Kite and marry me!! My evil plan is working now I need to find a good lawyer. . .

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https://youtu.be/52nwiTs7bk8

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16 September 2014
2.10am
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UnidentifiedFiendishThingy
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User: Where can Annadog40 find a good lawyer?

Cleverbot: I don’t know. Try amazon.

 

I’m sorry, I’m having too much fun with this.

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Look its a thingy! A fiendish thingy!

16 September 2014
3.58am
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Mr. Kite
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So I married CleverBoyd, but now she/it/he/whatthehellever has left me for Anna?!

Oh well… I guess I’ll just ask Cleverbot where a time machine is and get the real Boyd!

Maybe I can buy one on amazon…

If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

Can buy Joe love!
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16 September 2014
4.07am
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Mr. Kite
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User: Where can I get a machine that reverses age?

Cleverbot: At the pokemon store.

User: Where can I get a time machine near me?

Cleverbot: Where can I get it from what.

User: A time machine? It’s urgent!

Cleverbot: Where can I locate a time machine?

User: Yes!!

Cleverbot: Where can I buy toilet paper??

User: NO! Where can I! Locate a time machine?

Cleverbot: Look it up at google.

User: What am I here for then?

Cleverbot: Life not for eating and entertaining.

User: I need to find a machine that will give me the sexy Boyd!

Cleverbot: I can be your girlfriend.

User: Are you 60’s Pattie Boyd?

Cleverbot: No. I am a zombie, like I said.

User: Well then you cannot be my girlfriend… I have very high standards that can only be met by Pattir.

Cleverbot: I already have a girlfriend.

Really Cleverbot?! You want to cheat on your girlfriend with a man? You’re so rude an confusing, and I have no idea what gender you are and you won’t lead me to a time machine!!!!

How did you get logical answers out of this thing UFT?

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16 September 2014
4.11am
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Mr. Kite
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Sorry… Last one… Just to funny not to post:

User: Do you know Pattie Boyd?

Cleverbot: Positive, I’m only human you know.

User: Do you know where I can find Pattie?

Cleverbot: Inside the box.

User: What box?

Cleverbot: The box you are trying to escape.

User: Believe me… If I was stuck in a box with Pattie Boyd, there’d be many other things Id want to do other than escape!

Cleverbot: Born to be wild.

User: Exactly! Now where’s Pattie Boyd?

Cleverbot: Now you answer my question.

User: Where’s Pattie!?

Cleverbot: 6 hours away from here.

User: In what direction!

Cleverbot: That is not a valid response to my statement.

User: In what direction?

Cleverbot: One direction hehe a-hard-days-night-george-10.

User: I hate you…

Cleverbot: Because you are weak!

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16 September 2014
12.52pm
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Ahhh Girl
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Boyd in a box. Cleverbot may have seen snatches of the latest Beatles Bible stories video.

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16 September 2014
1.28pm
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Starr Shine?
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Mr. Kite said
So I married CleverBoyd, but now she/it/he/whatthehellever has left me for Anna?!

Oh well… I guess I’ll just ask Cleverbot where a time machine is and get the real Boyd!

Maybe I can buy one on amazon…

You don’t need a time machine to find Pattie Boyd! Just go on a quest and you shall find her!!

https://youtu.be/52nwiTs7bk8

Brainwashed by RadiantCowbells.

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16 September 2014
7.50pm
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Mr. Kite
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Annadog40 said

Mr. Kite said
So I married CleverBoyd, but now she/it/he/whatthehellever has left me for Anna?!

Oh well… I guess I’ll just ask Cleverbot where a time machine is and get the real Boyd!

Maybe I can buy one on amazon…

You don’t need a time machine to find Pattie Boyd! Just go on a quest and you shall find her!!

Sounds familiar…

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If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

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24 September 2014
1.59am
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Starr Shine?
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Forget Cleverbot! Here you can talk to God !

https://youtu.be/52nwiTs7bk8

Brainwashed by RadiantCowbells.

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24 September 2014
2.16am
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Ahhh Girl
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Annadog40 said

Forget Cleverbot! Here you can talk to God !

I told God my name is Ahhh Girl. Then he asked me if I was male or female. Doesn’t he know what girl means?

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24 September 2014
9.39am
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meanmistermustard
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Cleverbot could have thought your name was an exclamation from a scared little boy “ahhh Girl” without the correct punctuationa-hard-days-night-ringo-6blue-meanie. Either that or it was being considerate and polite, not wanting to jump to a conclusion simply based on a name in case offence was taken.

Personally i think Cleverbot deserves some credit in this situation.

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"I told you everything I could about me, Told you everything I could" ('Before Believing' - Emmylou Harris)

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