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Questions you'd ask Paul if you could interview him
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15 October 2013
Ahhh Girl
sailing on a winedark open sea

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The background for this post is over on pages 2 & 3 of the Paul interviews thread. We derailed that thread just a bit, so I'm bringing the conversation over here now.

acmac said

Seriously though, I do think Linda's "it's allowed" was something that was good for him to hear. The context was the early days of their dating, so Paul wanted to impress but was going through rough times with the Beatles and kept apologizing to her for being "tired," until she finally told him it was allowed. It goes along with her "don't worry about the map, let's just get lost!" philosophy that he also expressed such appreciation for. IMO it was good for him to be with someone more free-spirited, who could tame his goal-directed, anxious, workaholic tendencies. Nothing against Jane, I just think she was quite similar to Paul that way -- ambitious, appearance-conscious, etc., and that he benefited from chilling out more. Pot busts aside, he did "grow up" under Linda's influence: quit doing harder drugs (if you don't count the pot), became monogamous, a good dad, relatively stable, etc.

Rock on, acmac. Rock on, anybody. Save me. Open my clouded eyes. I'm not convinced yet. I want to be convinced, but I have my reservations. I'm just not buying what Paul's selling here.

In the Stern interview he talks about the biggness of the break up of the biggest band ever, and said something like, "O.K. Deal with that, buddy" about himself. I'm thinking (and I'm begging you all to prove me wrong) that he just wanted someone to give him permission to play hookey from the high-powered, high-emotion meetings that were going on at the time during the Beatles breakup. I'll whine that I'm tired, and Linda will tell me it's o.k. not to go which is what I want to hear. He didn't want to face the meetings and the breakup like a man full-on because it was just too painful. Buck up, dude, people have faced tough situations before with out hiding and shirking off meetings. The Beatles didn't create the atom bomb to beat Germany to it and then get really scared of what they had created and then try to get the president of the US to not use it and then see it used on people...twice. Now that's pressure that someone could cave under.

I don't buy that he was seeking permission to be less goal-directed, anxious, or workaholic. Perhaps there was a time in the 70's when he wasn't. Perhaps it's all a matter of degree? I see him as ambitious and appearance-conscious now. Look how he is portraying himself to appeal to a young audience. He has mentioned in too many of his recent interviews that he can't stand to not be working for very long. He said something like "after you watch one show on t.v. what else is there to do? I have to get back out there and create." He also mentioned in the Stern interview about successful people always trying to outdo one another. You can tell he is putting himself in that category. On the Bang & Olufsen show (and elsewhere) he talks about music being his therapy. He is a workaholic, but luckily he really enjoys what he does. So can you really say he is a workaholic? I don't think he has ever really been a person who could "turn off your mind, relax, and float downstream." I'm not so clear on the -anxious- part of the equation other than he wants to be considered a good as or better than some of the other singers/successful people he mentioned. I know he does want his new music to be received well as he said on the B&O interview today. He wants to put out good, quality music for his fans. He does have a reputation to uphold.

In the iheartradio release party where he was at that school, one kid asked him if he could go back in time is there anything he would change and if so what would he change. He said something about losing people you love. Then he quickly said that he likes all he's done musically with Wings and with his new band...yada yada yada. My perhaps over cynical ears heard, "Yeah, you guys in this band are ok, but I miss John like hell. Nancy, you're pretty cool, but you take second place to Linda." If I heard that right, I wonder if it bothers his current band mates? Does Nancy mind playing 2nd string to Linda?

So, I outed myself on the Halloween 2013 thread as a person who thinks and analyzes too much. I'm not a person who can "turn off your mind, relax, and float downstream". I think I'm looking at him way too much from the perspective of how I sit in harsh judgment myself.

I need to let this go. He's a good man. I've caved under much less pressure. In comparison to all of my deficiencies, all of his flaws could fit in my little right pinkie.

So, back on topic now:

Paul, what is the most special object (not your children nor the memories you have of her) of Linda's that you've kept? Is it on display in your house or studio or in a secret hiding place? How often do you look at it?

On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being the highest/most, where would you place your pain level right now over the breakup of the Beatles?

I know what you're thinking, MMM. I know these can't be my opening questions in the therapy session.

15 October 2013
Ahhh Girl
sailing on a winedark open sea

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meanmistermustard said
I dont believe Nancy is playing second fiddle to Linda, its more that Paul still loves Linda and doesn't forget her yet moves on with Nancy - its not about replacing Linda or forgetting about her but accepting that part of Paul's life but moving on. One problem Heather created was that she seemed to want Paul to forget everything about Linda and be about her only, something which pissed off the kids, caused a split and made them not take to her right from the off. 


As for his band, i think they know the role of the Beatles and John in Paul's life and have accepted it. The Beatles were huge, not only in the eyes of the public and fans but also of Paul, so there is no way they could ever match that. But no doubt Paul makes them feel wanted and have a great time - which comes across on the stage. The members of Wings also had to accept it before ever agreeing to play with Paul, no matter what Denny Laine offered he was never going to be as close to Paul as John or George or Ringo were due to what the four went thru in the 60's. 


Does any of that make sense? I dont know how else to write it.

Yes, it is perfectly clear, MMM. You wrote your thoughts very well. Thank you very much.

As far as a therapy session, I would start out by asking him about the dreams he has been keeping in his dream journal (the one we agreed that he would keep in the prior therapy session). We would analyze those for a bit. Perhaps do a little word association to get his mind primed for questions.

At some point in the session, I would ask him, "If someone were to open that door right now and tell you that Nancy has died of a heart attack, what would your first reaction be? What do you think your first few thoughts would be?" I would be looking for "I" statements vs "HER" statements. Is it all about him?

Then I would ask him to define love.

A few questions later I would ask him, "If someone were to open that door right now and tell you that Nancy had been killed by a crazed gun man, what would your first reaction be? What do you think your first few thoughts would be." I would be looking for "I", "HER", and "THEM" statements.

Then I would ask him if he wanted to modify his definition of love.

16 October 2013
coming in through the bathroom window
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"Please don't bring your banjo back, I know where it's been..  I wasn't hardly gone a day, when it became the scene..  Banjos!  Banjos!  All the time, I can't forget that tune..  and if I ever see another banjo, I'm going out and buy a big balloon!"


16 October 2013
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